Forgiveness
“How am I supposed to forgive that?” This is the most popular question that I am asked. Before we can discern a meaningful answer, it might be worth exploring what forgiveness means. I appreciate the explanation of forgiveness from the Anglican Archbishop Desmond Tutu:
“Forgiveness does not relieve someone of responsibility for what they have done. Forgiveness does not erase accountability. It is not about turning a blind eye or even turning the other cheek. It is not about letting someone off the hook or saying it is okay to do something monstrous. Forgiveness is simply about understanding that every one of us is both inherently good and inherently flawed. Within every hopeless situation and every seemingly hopeless person lies the possibility of transformation.”
Desmond Tutu led of a vigorous spiritual uprising that sought to end the apartheid in South Africa. It’s mind-boggling that racial segregation was ever legislated, but it’s a part of our country’s history, and it still occurs in places around the world. It appears that Desmond Tutu would be a wise person to garner advice from and to teach us about the nature of forgiveness. In so many ways, both personally and collectively, we often have to move-on from a painful past. Forgiveness is first and foremost about honesty. When hurt is acknowledged, then we can hope for transformation.
Forgiveness is not a switch that we flip on, it is a journey that can sometimes take a lifetime. The season of Lent is a time to intentionally focus on forgiveness. For these forty days, we confront our humanness, ask forgiveness from those we have wronged, and forgive people who have wronged us. Fundamentally, humility seeks forgiveness for the Cross and the ways we reject God. Somewhere along the way, doubling down on our wrong-doing has gotten misconstrued as strength, which could not be any further from the truth. Humbling ourselves before the Cross, and before others, we admit that we are all in need of redemption. We need the redemptive action of Christ, otherwise, what is Jesus dying for?
Seeking and extending forgiveness is no picnic. Forgiveness requires patience, maturity, and prayerfulness. With just a few days before Easter, you might ask yourself “who can I extend forgives to” and “who should I seek forgiveness from?” By the time Resurrection Sunday arrives, maybe we can celebrate a transformed and restored relationship that takes on a new life. If that seems too daunting or unrealistic, then maybe working on forgiveness in our own heart is a good place to start.
To answer bluntly, we are not “supposed” to do anything. God forgives people when we can’t. We are called to try our best at obtain virtues like honesty, empathy, and humility. Truthfully though, we will never obtain these virtues enough and where we fall short is exactly where Jesus kicks-in. Praise the Lord that we have a merciful and loving God who forgives us for what we have done and forgives us for the things we have left undone.
Always with Hope,
Pr Lucas McSurley
